In the early days of summer camp that was pre-service training, I have fond memories of frantically uploading photos in my limited time at internet cafes. If time allowed, I would add a cute description about my adventures bouncing around Panama. Then came the crazy stories of my adjusting to the community and the new locale. Having gotten the breezy stuff out of the way, I found myself thinking about what else to write.
While I will have spent two years hiking through the jungle and bathing in a river, that's not what has been exceptional about my time here. I slowly realized this and blogged accordingly. Novel experiences gave way to novel thoughts, thoughts about myself and the world we live in.
In the same way that readers may never fully realize what this experience has been for me, I don't think I can fully realize what it's like to read my posts. I probably spend too much time worrying about what others think. How do I talk about larger themes without sounding patronizing? Just because I'm in the Peace Corps doesn't make me an authority on a subject. How do I talk about my growth in a way that captures all the trials and tribulations (i.e. the reasons why I'm growing) without making my family lose sleep at night? My time hasn't exactly been sunshine and high-fives, but I certainly wouldn't have grown as much if that were the case.
One of the more surprising aspects of the blog has been how much I've enjoyed it. Alongside the blog, I've kept a journal that's more free-flowing babble. It's been fun thinking about what will make the cut for the blog. What do I think is worth sharing?
I've realized the blog also addresses some immediate personal needs.
- Feeling like I'm connected to the world back home, however peripherally
- Documenting a strange and transformative time in my life
- In a setting without much in the way of art, culture, or productivity in general, the feeling of actually creating something
So thank you to those that follow my blog. As much as this blog is for me, I think about all of you during the process. I hope all is well on the home front and to the fellow volunteers, keep on keepin' on en la lucha.
